Week 11 Preparing for CRJ and WIP

I'm finding this hand in very stressful. I find the contextualising and critical reflecting very hard to put into a written document to the point that i feel like giving it all up, it makes me very anxious. I know what they want me to do but my brain works very slow in processing information and i get over whelmed by the tasks at hand. I'll keep moving forward but i'm not expecting great things from this Module results as i know i haven't delivered what they want. I do worry about the written aspect of this degree. I love researching and the physical photography aspect of the work but putting it together is a mind field for me. 

Now i've got a better CRJ platform that i enjoy working from i think next modules CRJ will be much more fluid and done correctly and weekly. This in turn i hope will make the essays easier to manage. 

I've also been assigned my study support person through the DSA but i haven't been able to see her yet, i was only given her details this week and due to having Laryngitis i was unable to meet with her. Hopefully i might get a meeting with her next week just to meet up and get to know one another ready for the next module. I'm really hoping she will be able to help me with the written work as my last study skills advisor was brilliant, i had her when i studied at Falmouth university for my BA.

I havent done anything to do with the the last two weeks topics in Canvas that we were given, i looked, read, watched the video and thats it. I can't think about anything else at the moment.

Oh dear, i've just been going over my weekly CRJ and had a big realisation, I've wondered that far from the original idea that i'm lost and don't know where i'm going with this. I started out with nature and wildlife and now i'm looking at a man who designed gardens. This came about from my boredom in the orchard and wondering into the garden. Not focusing on the project in hand. This is also a reflection of my own personal life which i've been reflecting on. Saying that i wonder around a lot in my life with my work. Maybe i need to take the challenge to stay with one thing, place, project and focus on that instead of allow the flow to take me. Maybe i've learnt that for me thats the idea of the masters is to master that thing, not wonder off when you've just started something. To focus on that idea and master that one thing, not go off to a new area. I seem to do this a lot. Good- Bad? i have no idea i just know at the moment i'm lost with this work. maybe i need to go back to the original idea and re focus on that. 

I think the image are still worthy of the project as it's still in the same location at Iford manor just not of the orchard. I've had progress with the image and style and i feel like i'm growing in terms of creating narratives within the frame. I just feel like i've gone wrong somewhere. The orchard was very dormant in winter months, getting ready to bare fruit again. Maybe it wasn't stimulated enough by what i was seeing but then i should have search harder, not taken the easy route out of wondering off in another direction when things get bit boring for me.